Can Lifehacker Solve Our Sex Chaos Too?

Every once in a while, I get to interview someone on my radio show who's not known for their sex life, but who I get to interrogate with erotic nosy questions anyway!

This week's victim is one of my favorite bloggers, Gina Trapani, who edits Lifehacker, a highly addictive Gawker site that gives constant, intriguing geeky tips on how to get your shit together.

As I said to Gina, it might be a fabulous cosmic joke to entertain the idea that we can Organize Ourselves Into Better Mutants, but I am certainly one of her site's susceptible groupies.

In Bed With Susie Bright 252: Interview with Gina Trapani, Lifehacker Editrix

If you are a fan of Lifehacker, or girl geeks in general, you will be delighted to hear what exactly Gina is doing with her cameraphone (she's dangerous) and how she parries my urgent suggestions for posting vibrator advice on her site.

She says she's not going to let her mom listen to sections of this interview, but I hope she'll relent.

I love to have guests weigh in the letters I receive to the show. This time, we discuss what to advise a lesbian lover from Akron, who writes to say that she can't make her "more experienced" girlfriend come, and it's driving her up the wall. Fallen pride and sheer exasperation are at stake here!

Haven't we all BEEN THERE when it comes to enduring a helpless, hopeless hour of unsuccessful muff-diving?  Either side of the predicament is a nightmare. Gina fell off her chair laughing during this part of the question, so I gathered she is also in sympathy. With lesbians, there's the extra agony of the "it coulda been me" sensations.

When you're making love to someone who is supposedly "experienced" and orgasmic, —and yet they are unresponsive to your touch— what's a gal or guy to do?  Get kinky enough to make them spill? Lie back and say, 'Well, do me then, darling!" Commit harakiri from the shame of it all?

We decided I needed a PICTURE of the recalcitrant control freak to figure it out... sometimes words aren't enough! Preferable a secret candid taken on a surreptitious cameraphone.  We sure had a fun time considering the possibilities.

Don't forget, you can send your confidential questions, feedback about the show, and requests for Susie's brand-spanking new "Girly Cards" to susie@susiebright.com, (Episode 252, June 2, 2006)

Comments

[Sandrino]

The interview with Gina was great but are we ever gonna see those candid photos?

[Susie Bright]

Nevah! She was all set to go Flickr me into notoriety, but I made wild threats.

[Steve]

Well, in the picture you did post, she's really cute. And has a devilish twinkle in her eye.

[misterniceguy1960]

At present I have two lovers (out of circumstances, not greed). One is just learning to give head, but the other prides herself on skills of professional caliber. Neither one can make me spill orally, although gods know I'd love to.

I have no idea why this is so, although I note that it's been a problem since my first time.

[Anti-Em]

Hi Susie,
I'm writing to comment on ep #253? (Cupid's Broken Arrow), specifically about Karens letter.

Unsurprisingly I am thrilled that you are talking about tranny issues. Your advice and care was especially good this week. But I think that it would also help Karen to be directed to some other resources. You've surely heard of the Gendertalk radio show (and podcast) out of Boston. One of the hosts is, if memory serves, an engineer and MTF too. That show dispenses advice too and, as it would come from someone with more direct personal experience it might be a useful addition to your advice. There is also, as you know(!), Dr. Patrick Califia (who is amonngs many other things, a professional counsellor and FTM) who has an open access advice column at a sex toy site (http://www.venusenvy.ca/Advisor/). Once again: I'd be thrilled to listen to an interview with you and Patrick about anything, but especially sex and disability.

Happy thoughts!

[anonymous]

There are times when women (and some men) don't come.
And it sometimes has nothing to do with the skill
level of their partner. It sometimes has to do with brain chemistry. Serotonin, specifically (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Serotonin).

I've had the same partner for many years.
Sometimes, I come, sometimes I don't come.
During the times I've been on Prozac
(which acts on Serotonin), I've been inorgasmic
for many months. He can do the exact same things
the exact same ways; I can be extremely aroused,
extremely interested but sometimes I will come
and sometimes I won't.

Stuff happens (or doesn't happen). While I've
been very aroused by masturbation, I've never,
ever come that way. And I've practiced! ;->
I understand the biological points; I understand
what should happen. But I also don't laugh when
I tickle myself, and I suspect those things
are related.

[rosewood]

I'm with you, Susie. Her girlfriend can "only" come from tribadism?!?! I was so thrilled when I met a woman who could come that way. What a miracle! Who would ever think that such a thing were possible?

Where are lesbians learning about sex these days? From our lovers, one by one isn't sufficient and too few listen to your program. I'm glad our friend in Akron wrote you. Ride on!