And as Jackie Gleason said, "Away We GO!"
Shout-out to "our beloved Nancy Reagan."
Yeah, you can just imagine what her astrologer has to say about this campaign.
Looks directly into camera; McCain never gets that.
O brings up "middle class" right away.
Uh-oh, a "set piece" about Joe The Plumber. These stories are so embarrassing; workers are portrayed as a special zoo collection. "Joe the Spotted Fowl."
McCain is explaining how Obama is going to ruin this exotic man Joe's life. McCain wants to help Joe Plumber buy that business. He is writing him a check!
I want McCain to get out his checkbook NOW. C'mon Joe, call in!
And here comes the first socialist accusation! Obama is promoting "class warfare!"
I'm having a little tingle that class warfare is even being mentioned. I'm so excited it's crossing Republican minds.
O. must be really sick of McCain lying about his tax breaks... everyone knows Obama is hardly a radical on this issue. He wants to go back to Reagan Era tax levels! Get Nancy on the phone and have her explain this!
He is hysterical about "spreading the wealth around." I didn't realize this has become such a damning insult. Didn't Jesus promote this, too?
Bob Schiffer wants to know part of the budget O. and M. are going to cut, if they're realistic about the mess we're in.
We could get everything we need just cutting out GOP graft. Where's Jack Abramoff's checkbook?
We need nuclear power. We need nuclear power.
I have a bigger scalpel than Obama.
Slight retro attack on FDR.
Obama is spending a million dollars on a overhead projector planetarium for his home town; can you believe the nerve?
I'm not rising to that shit.
I can balance our national budget in one year, no prob.
M. starting to rock on his pony, now, repeating same things back and forth.
He says O. doesn't have nerve to defy his own party when it's needed.
Rising to that shit.
Please Obama, don't get suckered by the pony. Why don't you mention voting against Iraq war? HELLO?
Has the scars to prove how much he's stood up to George Bush. Name-dropping Barry Goldwater.
OH WOW! He's calling Obama a racist for not denouncing John Lewis the other day! M. feels disgraced by being associated with George Wallace! Yes, McCain, world famous civil rights leader!
Slightly stunned by this Orwellian doublefuck.
Blown away that McCain has the nerve to bring up "negative" advertising.
This is the first time I've seen him get ticked.
O. doesn't have to defend John Lewis-- I'm sure Lewis will go berserk in the morning.
Fucking Joe The Plumber is back in the picture!
Your VP candidate is throwing rallies of people yelling for my assasination, and you have the nerve to bring up the civil rights movement!
I don't want to tit for tat, I want to talk about issues. Let's talk health care.
I'm proud of my white supremacist raliies....
No, he didn't say that. But that's the message, isn't it John?
Obama's campaign has been disseminating... pornographic?... tshirts and it has to stop....
What is this tshirt? I wanna see.
GOP has used a strategy of using smear to run elections, a legacy now of their party.
ACORN ACORN ACORN!
I'm going to directly respond to this Bill Ayers shit.
I am not involved in ACORN.
My associations are Warren Buffet, Paul Volker, Joe Biden, Dick Luger, Nato Commander Jim Jones. These are the people who've shaped my ideas.
You and Ayers started your whole campaign in his living room!
I bet they were smoking pot!
He's flailing now...
Bragging about Biden.
Sarah Palin is a role model for women.
Sarah cares about special needs children, she understands AUTISM. Huh?
And her husband is a "tough guy"!
If you want to deal with Autism, you need MONEY, John.
boring boring boring
Now, Bob wants to talk about CLIMATE CONTROL... what an idiot. Check his thermostat.
We'll cut off all oil from Middle East and Venezuela. Canadian oil is white and nice! We can lick this thing in a few years!
I'll take TEN YEARS, Bob! And I'll take some offshore drilling, but we can't drill our way out of the problem.
Wheeee. someone finally said solar, wind, geothermal.
Now he's pitching his CCC idea of independent energy.
Don't let Obama's eloquence bamboozle you!
Columbian drug dealers! Sleazy, you betcha!
He's falling apart here.
Put everybody's feet to the fire, and lower tariffs. Let's have a industrial renaissance of clean energy programs and jobs.
Obama wants to sit down with Hugo Chavez and make out with him! Terrorist make-out session! I will not allow a depression!
Here's my healthcare plan, this is my big deal. An ounce of prevention...
Classic Democratic politics.
Fat people make me sick.
Everybody's records need to be online, like the V.A.
If I were John McCain, i would not mention the success of the VA Hospitals...
FUCK NO! Joe the Plumber is back! I had a Fischer-Price toy with this same name.
Obama is going to fine people who don't buy into his stupid insurance plan.
More SICKO examples and evidence.
John's tax rebates for health insurance are a nightmare.
Joe the Plumber is having his plans ruined to one day become a vicious capitalist and rip off his underlings. How can you deny his dream?
With my Free Beer program— I mean my $5K Coupon Rebate program— everyone is going to choose their own futures!
I have to fight socialism! Stop spreading wealth! You'll never get to be a rich fuck if you can't cheat!
Okay, Bob Says, what about Supreme Court appointments?
I am a paragon of virture, there is not litmus test. I bucked the evangelical right on this... n
OK, he didn't say that, but he should blow everyone's mind and admit it.
Hmmm... he won't stoop to Roe vs Wade cornering.
I unequivocally support Right to Privacy. Of course, I am going to look at Supreme Court Justices with gravitas.
Brings up Ledbetter case, and John's vote that denied women economic pay justice. Tell it!
I'm changing the topic to Pro-Life! Obama is letting babies die on the table! I'm bringing up Partial Birth Abortions! Like I know what the fuck I'm talking about! I hate these surgeries!
Stop being insane on this issue. No one wants a late-term abortion... it's about the mother's survival and welfare, you dope.
Could we deal with prevention, and cavalier activity?
That's a creepy word to use about women's sexuality: "cavalier."
When the abortion fiends want get more abortions, they pretend it's the "mother's health." Yes, they'll say anything to HAVE ANOTHER THRILLING LATE TERM ABORTION!
Who are these "exteme-abortion" people, I wonder, that John refers to. Who does he think they are? Socialists? Slutty socialists?
(If you want to read some righteous sister outrage on this part of the debate, go see the open thread on Jezebel, Live Blogging with their readers, pages 38-60).
This conversation needs a big feminist intervention. I don't want to hear another man talk about his expertise in abortion EVER again.
Now, Bob's changed the topic to education.
Demo party position. And turn off the TV, people!
I believe we should let public education to continue to go right down the toilet. I couldn't care less. We need to help banks get more money by ripping off students.
"No Chid Left Behind is a crock." Shame shame shame!
I, Ms. Blogger, would like to mention here that my friend teaches in a public high school here that doesn't have a SINGLE WORKING TOILET... the bathrooms are marked with HAZMAT TAPE.
No Child Left Behind just needs a little retinkering. Gee, we're just learning how to do this!
Okay, this is weird, McCain is bringing up autism, again. He says Sarah Palin knows all about it. But what does her family have to do with autism? I thought her baby has Down Syndrome?
I am not a socialist. I will not spend money. No taxes. You need to trust me.
I want to remind you about my military service.
George Bush is louder than your words, Senator McCain.
We have to invest in people again. I have a dream... let's do Camelot!
I will kill myself to make this work!
-------okay, applause, and it's over!
McCain was not a squirming disaster tonight. He seemed "rehearsed" and "saccharine" but not ready to keel over and die, as he did in previous debate.
I thought this was going to be the worst encounter, but it was, in debate terms, the best.
Here's the CBS followup... they have a young man with gelled hair on the mike, who thought McCain won! But he's undecided.
Anyone who is genuinely undecided at this point is a liar or high.
These "citizens" are completely implausible.
Didn't Samantha Bee do something hilarious about these undecided zombies?
I didn't get a good look at Cindy and Michelle for the after-debate hug... how did they look? Any Faux-Pas? I was typing and didn't look up in time.
OKay, CBS decided the story THEY wanted for tonight is that McCain won, Obama was sad and dismal, ha ha ha. Wag the Tail, people!
I'm switching to NBC and Mitt Romney. He says John McCain IS SO COOL! His tan is FLAWLESS. He knows that Obama is a socialist, too! Not really American! Stop spreading around the money! Obama is a smooth operator, but he's an ultra leftist!
Now we're going to hear from Hillary. She took a Valium, but she was there in person.Boring. She is gratuitously pro-Obama, but not attacking GOP or McCain. C'mon Hillary, take a bite.
Now I'm listening to NPR on the radio. They're having a big "talk-in" at Virginia Tech. I gave a "How to Read a Dirty Movie" lecture there, and half the students gagged and walked out when the first gay kiss came on the screen. The other half were thrilled to death.
Audience asks why no one talked about what the war had done to this country. No shit.
It's bizarre to me that as these reporters go out and try to find Joe and Jane Average, they never seem to find ANYONE who says, "I am so sick of this whole system I could puke. We never even get to talk about half the things that are really going on. The Democrats have got to get out of the REpublican's beds when they aren't posturing for these debates."
I think this debate is a media spin, to give McCain a little blip at the end. "Hey, he's coherent for a few minutes, after all! Let's give the man his due!" They want a little more drama for their spinmeisters before November.
But the real story is the vote tampering that the GOP is going to spend EVERY LAST DIME ON. They really don't'believe in "winning" elections anymore; the "stealing" angle is so much more efficient.
McCain's big theme this evening was the evil of "spreading." He says Obama will spread money, and women will spread their legs for willy-nilly abortions, and obesity is spreading as we speak!
McCain stands firm against spread!
I saw Obama's brow furrow for the first time.. when McCain brought up how insulted he was by " Obama's "negative campaigning." That's rich.
You just find yourself dying to know what O would say if he was uninhibited.
What do you think? Hit that comment button, baby!
Photo Credit: Westminster Hospital Legendary Duel