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April 12, 2007

Vargas in Drag

Apr_44__calendar Once upon a time there was a pin-up girl, a whore with a heart of gold who realized she could line her pockets with a little well-placed advertising.

She was an exhibitionist, proud of her assets — or in another view, she was under pressure to exploit her physical charms, regardless of pride or joy.

She wanted to be an actress, a showgirl; maybe even a star. In real life, she might never have made it past dime-a-dance.


by Susie Bright,  from the exhibition catalog for "Alberto Vargas: The Esquire Pinups," Spencer Museum of Art, University of Kansas, curated by Maria Elena Buszek and Stephen Goddard

But something happened to the pin-up girl — she got religion, which in the case of the American WWII effort, was nothing but riotously devout patriotism. Whatever a soldier wanted or needed to fight the Nazis became sacrament. If he wanted pictures of beautiful babes to masturbate and pray to, by God, who wouldn’t support democracy?

The pin-up girl put on a uniform, and she hitched it up good and tight. She showed that she was not only a tiger in the sack, but a hellion on a missile, a bombardier Amazon. Her sexual charisma was just part of her winning attitude, and with her inspiring image, a warrior could feel like nothing would defeat him. She had arrived.

1267_l Today, if you travel America, you'll find many little boys (and others!) playing soldier, not with plastic army men, but with video games. In each fight-to-the-death scenario, they must pick who their “character” will be — the persona they both identify with, and who they give combat instructions to.

The kids might not know who pin-up artist Vargas was; they weren’t even born during his pin-up heyday. But the favorite role model in their joystick universe could be an überfemme who'd be blissfully at home in any 1940’s Varga Girl gatefold— say, Lara Croft, “Tomb Raider” heroine and kick-ass sex symbol superstar.

Vargas’ girls, his wartime divas, set the course for modern pin-up girls which liberated their image from bordello advertising and transformed them into All-American Girls. They made their most memorable mark in monthly centerfolds in Esquire magazine, the leading men's magazine of its day.

Yet their wholesomeness and mainstream acceptance came at an ironic cost: the pin-up girl lost quite a bit of her devoted femininity.

Vargas’ women may have floated about in bits of diaphanous lingerie, but many of them were built like boy soldiers with bosoms. They wear lots of makeup, and they have lots of attitude— but they also have no hips, and no intention of fainting. Sure, there’d been tough girls in our feminine imagery before, but they weren’t glorious like this — triumphant, winning without breaking a nail.

Today there is no sexual heroine on the horizon who isn’t a diva warrior. Soldiers like Princess Xena are warriors first, and lovers later, if you’re among the lucky chosen. Sure, they live to inspire, but for all the erections they promote, they also lend an air of invincibility. You not only want to seduce these Valkyries, you want to become them, and that’s as true for little boys as it is for little girls.

My interest in the Vargas pin-up collection, (now collected at the Spencer Museum at the University of Kansas), comes from my curiosity about the moment in time when “the girl in the picture” became sexually assertive, transgressing the indolent feminine caricatures that once defined the erotic female portrait.

This post-war, post-corset pin-up girl is not round, she is not propped up with pillows, she is not waiting for something to happen to her. She expresses her lust and humor with unladylike independence— she even broods without apology. By Laura Croft’s standards, the Varga Girl is just a slip of a thing; but then, Miss Croft’s caricature has never been emblazoned on a A-bomb either, so maybe she still has something to learn.

May_41_gatefold In looking over this Vargas exhibition, the likenesses that stand out the most to my transgression-seeking eye are the ones where Vargas’ Girls turn boyish — in male costume, physique, pose, and expression.

Most of these are not the famous peep-through-the-nightie portraits that became so ubiquitous in Vargas’ Playboy era, but are rather his strongest patriotic expressions of the war period— as well as expressing his cosmopolitan fantasy life, playing footsie with American puritanism.

In the May 1941 Esquire gatefold, we see a striking example of the latter: a Thanksgiving-style pilgrim, smoking her cigarette in a see-through black gown, apparently giving a line to a Spanish maja, clad in white lace and looking rather unconcerned in her own private daydream.

The decidedly uncontrite Puritan is smirking and flicking her ash. In my imagination, I could hear the Pilgrim Witch delivering a punchline to the Papist Babe about some poor sucker she just put through the wringer. What we have to be thankful for, indeed!

Sept_47_calendar The September 1947 calendar girl also lends herself to a particularly relevant interpretation by the standards of today’s erotic icons.

In this image, unlike any other , the model is slouched, smoking, hiding her eyes, not in shyness but in private sulking. Her cold shoulder overwhelms her Vargas bust-line for once, both figuratively and literally. Her hair is not immaculate; it's unkempt and falling down, curling around her strong upper arm.

Below the knees, however, we see a strangely different woman — lower legs posed on command (“porno toes,” I call them), with the model flexing the arch of her feet to achieve Barbiesque high heels.

When I first contemplated this particular Varga Girl, I was visiting her on my Internet browser, and due to the size of my screen, I could only view the upper half of her body without scrolling. I was so struck by her internal point of view, her “I-don’t-give-a-damn” posture, that it was many minutes before I scrolled down to her paper-doll legs— which at that point, looked like an aberration.

Vargas clearly took a risk with this internal, rebellious portrayal; and for some reason, through lack of craft or determination, he didn’t pursue her body language down to the floor. I prefer to contemplate her personality as it is most forcefully expressed in her face and upper body.

What makes this Varga redhead so sexy by today’s standards is that she captures the current erotic principles of rebellion, melancholy, and self-centeredness. These qualities are the very spirit of everything in hip titillation, from Rebel Without A Cause to rock‘n’roll itself.

Today’s sex symbols are not wholesome or well-scrubbed — and neither is this little witch. She seems to be unavailable not because she’s too good for you, but because she’s too bad for her own bad self.

Like any MTV siren of today, she is not so terrifying to others as she is potentially self-destructive. Our modern culture has a sexual ache for an Achilles heel, and that’s exactly what we should have seen at the bottom of this angel’s limbs, instead of a perky pedicure.

Dec_42_gatefoldVargas had either a schizophrenic or a lackadaisical attitude toward rendering a holistic, complete female figure. On many other occasions his pin-ups seem to lose their resolve half-way through their expression that they remind me of ancient rediscovered statues who are missing an arm.

Take the Esquire gatefold from December 1942, for example, an adorable Santa Claus specialty, with a full-cheeked, robust redhead laughing gaily at her holiday surprise. Her arm looks like she works on a farm, or drives a big rig — you almost expect to see her CB handle in a caption underneath. From the bust up, this gal is strong, with some weight to both her chuckle and her physique.

Below that proud bosom however, her body is taken over by something else — a wasp waist, an invisible bottom, and the template legs that we saw facing the other direction in September ‘47. What were the forces that spun Vargas in two directions — were they as banal as a lack of skill or time, or a tempest of wills between artist and publisher?

Jun_42_gatefold The feminine ass is something that has to be considered further in Vargas’ pin-ups. In some, though not all of his paintings, the women simply haven’t achieved that secondary feminine characteristic — their buttocks are that of a fabulous boy. He created these images long before Twiggy, anorexia, or Kate Moss; so we can’t blame it on the trends of the time, which favored a more womanly, hip-centric view.

The most shocking and transparent example of this “boy with boobs,” the Varga’s pin-up in drag, is the June 1942 gatefold, which features a muscular, broad-shouldered blond, nude except for a ridiculous sun hat hiding his/her slim hips. Take away the bonnet and the profile of the breast, and you have a dead ringer for one of George Platt Lynes' sailor boys photographed from the back.

Feb_42_calendar February 1942’s calendar page, a court jester in red, is another boy/girl whose feminine attributes disappear as you step away from it — or in my case, when when I simply take off my glasses and everything goes fuzzy. The breasts and stomach are curiously “stuck” in the middle of the figure, and seem to have no effect on the silhouette. Is she getting ready to play a gender trick on the court with her magic mandolin?

Vargas’ girls explore a full closet of male costume: the jester, sailor, weight lifter, soldier, hunter, classical composer, cowboy with six shooters, and the father of our county.

Aug_42_gatefold_2 My favorite of these drag portraits is August 1942, the defiant George Washington! This time Vargas delivers a completely feminine physique who takes over the presidency and dares you to do anything about it. Her swagger and her cape thrown to one side give the air of a pirate crossed with the Marquis de Sade. She’s a dominatrix, she WANTS YOU to serve her AND your country with equal obedience.

In general, however, Vargas in drag leans more towards Peter Pan than the magnificent Daddy/Diva-ness of the George Washington centerfold.

In the October 1941 calendar, we see an archer, bracing her bow into the sky, with her impressive aim and strength somewhat diminished by the silly pair of elf shoes at her feet.

Oct_41_calendarWhat is it with Vargas, and his women’s legs betraying their heads? This Diana should have been in boots, we should have seen her target. This tomboy coulda been a contender.

Whether posing with weapons or laughing on the floor while she counts her push-ups, the Varga girl was an Olympian — jockeying for position, laughing at risk, sporting unflappable confidence.

Aside from the phenomenon of Babe Didrikson Zaharis, the female athletic giants of Vargas’ heyday simply didn’t appear on the American pop culture map. If they ever made an appearance, they were sure to be called lesbians.

Marie Elena Buszek, a Vargas scholar, has written that “Vargas’ anatomical exaggerations of the female figure would have been downright monstrous on a real woman.”

But if you picked the right night in Hollywood, Vargas’ Girls would not so much have been sci-fi apparitions as they would have been dyke-baited — or better yet, recruited as she-male porn stars. By today’s standards, Varga Girls are gender-benders.

Among Vargas’ curious gender-benders, none is more romantic and female-sympathetic than that of his July 1943 gatefold of a bridal kiss, between a groom in uniform and his veiled beloved.

Jul_43_gatefoldThis soldier groom has not one whisker on his cheeks. His lids are darkened, with eyelashes as thick as a girl’s. His face recalls no one so much as Elizabeth Taylor, at the moment she kissed Montgomery Clift in A Place in the Sun.

In that famous still from George Cukor’s film, Taylor’s eyes were also downcast, her lips yearning for the reckoning that can be viewed just as clearly in the Vargas bridal portrait. The only difference is that Montgomery Clift, young and fair as he was, was still a hundred times more masculine than the groom in Vargas’ chapel.

My first reaction to this wedding-day gatefold was that it was the perfect retro-bliss poster to promote same-sex marriages, in this case of an exquisite butch/femme lesbian couple. Indeed, the blonde femme in this portrait is the one with the more determined jaw, her mouth suggesting a hint of sadness or even cruelty. Her ambivalence, with her mouth still not accepting her lover’s, creates even more dissonance and attraction.

The contemporary craze for pin-up girls and their subversive possibilities began in the 80s, when rebellious feminists, particularly lesbians and bisexual women, looked for visual role models who seemed to offer transgressive potential.

If Bettie Page could be a simultaneous athlete, bathing beauty, and Bondage Princess — if Katherine Hepburn and Greta Garbo could vamp it up in slacks and a devil-may-care attitude — these images offered a catalyst of fantasy material to adventurous women who wanted all the sexual power they could afford.

In the 1980s, Vargas’ pin-ups were re-imagined by a popular artist, Olivia de Bernardinis, whose line of prints, greeting cards and calendars all deified the conquering femme with a direct line to the Vargas gatefold imagery.

This time, however, there was no patriotism involved, just sheer sex. This time, a female artist held the brush. As someone who was involved in the retail end of “wimmin’s” culture at the time, I can well recall the stampede of women eager to collect every image of de Bernardinis’ work.

Bettie_by_olivia_2 Men coveted them as well; but this time, women were the new audience, not simply looking to imitate the model’s clothes, but to cherish her eroticism, to be aroused and inspired by the knowledge that a woman was the author of these fantasies.

What would Vargas think today of Olivia de Bernardinis, or photographers Del La Grace, Annie Sprinkle, Cathy Opie, Phyllis Christopher,  —  or the host of radical women artists who have taken the pin-up to new heights of queer romance and genderfuck distinctions?

How would Vargas cope with Lara Croft, raiding the identities of boys and men alike on a small-screen battleground? Would he hide behind a polka-dot sun hat, shying away from the spotlight of the new sexual authenticity? Or would he face us down, like George Washington with tits and ass, defying us ever to diminish his legend?


March 29, 2007

Casey Sonnabend, by way of Warhol's Rejection Letter

Warholreject


I FOUND THIS underneath my car seat today. The original is on stiff parchment paper, which has barely aged.

It's a letter, dated October 18, 1956, from the Museum of Modern Art, rejecting a "Shoe" drawing that Warhol offered to donate to them. If you click on the image, you can read it actual-size.

No, my car isn't this old. I wonder if the letter's appearance is due to a very happening ride I took with some paintings of Casey Sonnabend's, a 70+ year old artist who is currently living in his van in Santa Cruz, but who has painted non-stop for fifty years.

443712737_2c0ea8d6c4 Casey knows— and has outlived— all his contemporaries. He studied with Kokoschka, had a little skirmish over his first wife with Bob Dylan, listened to David Crosby's first confessions about how he planned to sell out, and seemed to in the oily paint of every Greenwich Village, Big Sur and North Beach scene. All the while painting— my partner calls him the "original icono-classicist."

Casey's storage space if filled with thousands of paintings, photographs, and mementos from comrades now long gone. This letter must have been stuck to one of the canvases, and then slipped underneath my Tinkerbelle floor mat.

I have a soft spot for rejection letters. Of course I've been mortally wounded by quite a few. I've agonized over any one I've ever written.

This is a particularly courteous rejection letter— I've never received one with such careful language. Is is a relic of the past? Has anyone been rejected by MOMA lately?— Are they still this delicate?

Manners aside, MOMA might be kicking themselves now over this turn-down. Andy's "shoes" are everywhere. I even have some stationery and matching envelopes with his high heels strewn all over them.

UPDATE: A reader in the know has just informed me that this "letter" is in fact a reproduction that's being included in some special purse that's being sold to customers today. Now I am more confused than ever, as I have not been the recipient of a new purse or any swag with Warholian accessories! However, I don't want to erase my post altogether because I did want to talk about Casey, and rejection, and the art world... so I'll leave it with this update. Tinkerbelle strikes again!



24893003

September 29, 2006

Lysol My WHAT?

868

Click on photo to enlarge, and you can read all the exciting details about how to "lysol" your vagina for a happy marriage bed. For even more vintage ad fun, see Eat Liver, which specializes in memorable ads and pictures like this.

September 25, 2006

L’Origine du Monde

Today's geology lesson: a recent photo from Arches National Park in Utah. I'm told the term used for this type of erosion is called invagination.

Laurarock



Thanks to world traveler Laura Rice for the photo.... and to Gustave Courbet (1819-1877) for the title idea.

July 30, 2006

Commie Sex Trap



 

Dammit, this was going to be MY memoir title.



Commie Sex Trap, originally uploaded by Jan Tonnesen.

June 28, 2006

Rimjobs: Yay or Nay


You loved the Wet Spots. You cried until you came with Polly-Wally. Now, from sin-auteur Kirby Ferguson, Charlene hits the street to get to the bottom of an always divisive topic: rimjobs. How come I'm never in Toronto on the right day?

June 15, 2006

Erotica, Marie Osmond, Disney Dames, and Dirty Flashes

I just discovered the most amazing erotic blogger. Her journal's name is Pretty Dumb Things, and and although she might be pretty (that part is left to your imagination) she is certainly not dumb; she is an incredible wordsmith and erotic storyteller. To wit:

Sometimes when I’m lying under Donny, one or both thighs resting on his shoulders, or when I’m on my hands and knees in front of him, his hands spreading the halves of my cling peach ass, and his cock is drilling my pussy with pile-driver precision— sometimes at those moments, I think to myself, why am I doing this?

Why, I wonder, do I give him my body, my pussy mostly, though I suppose he enjoys the other bits and parts too—the shakey-shake of my ass when he drives into me from behind, those subtle and seismic movements like jostling pudding under plastic wrap, the swing and release of my breasts when he fucks me on top—why, I wonder, do I do it?

Paulwithdonnymarie And speaking of Donny... Marie Osmond's teenage daughters are self-proclaimed, unrepentant  bisexual "sluts," according to their myspace declarations. The girls' bawdy pages are much to their mother's dismay, who had her own dicey turn as The Female Mormon Paragon of Virtue. Remember her post-partum freakout?  Osmond is now blaming Internet porn for the whole mess. I blame her sexually repressed doll collection. More here.

If only Marie had read Good Girls And Wicked Witches: Changing Representations of Women in Disney's Feature Animation, 1937-2001. It's a new book by Amy Davis. I haven't read it yet, but I'm so intrigued!  The blurb says: "...Davis re-examines the notion that Disney heroines are rewarded for passivity." 

I always said, Tinkerbell rocks! I've put my copy on reserve at the library.

My last link of the day for you is "How to Take Better Dirty Pictures" by Mike and Mandy, which is subtitled "Mikey’s Guide to Photographing Naked Babes." —Some darn helpful quick 'n' easy technical advice.

As you can tell by Mikey's subtitle, it does have the air of the well-intentioned but not exactly radical feminist male photographer... yet I sympathize with his good intentions and appreciation for all bodies female!

What I found myself thinking, however, was how you would change his wording if the subject was the male nude, and the shooter was female? Or, what if a woman is photographing herself, or it was the same gender on both sides of the camera? The tone changes, and it makes you realize the underlying sex role vibe.

The patronizing tone that can come into traditional photo-tips manuals is not all sexism, though. Here's the unspoken secret of shooting an erotic pictorial, or any portrait: the photographer, by necessity, often has to deal with the model as a kind of prop, as unkind as that might seem on first impression.

The model has to submit to certain requirements, that's just the way it is. Still, there's a degree of intimacy and respect to collaborating with subjects as equals, that takes more time but delivers remarkable results. In some cases, the model may be leading the shoot, too, but that would be a someone who would be equally comfortable on either side of the camera.

A lot of models aren't up for it, they just want a pretty picture, a flattering likeness. I mean, we all do, sometimes, eh? But the best photo shoots I ever did were more demanding!

Does anyone know of a quick dirty guide to turning your camera on yourself? I'm always trying to take photos of myself with mostly silly results.

June 11, 2006

Snip Snip Snip

Once upon a time, there was a couple named Karen and Ted, who were happily married.  But it was time for them to have "The Talk."

1

One sunny afternoon, Karen broached a difficult subject with Ted. 

"Ted," she said.  "Do you see that roller coaster awkwardly placed in the back of this picture that we're in?  That roller coaster is a glaring metaphor for all of the pregnancy scares that I've had over the years.  I do believe that it's time that we talked about permanent birth control.  Permanent birth control for men."

"Let's wait to discuss this over coffee while sitting on our futon couch," said Ted.

And so they waited.

2

"I don't know that a vasectomy is really necessary," said Ted.  "Just seeing you sitting there in those blue leggings and old gym socks might be enough to guarantee that we never have sex again."

"Shut up, Ted," said Karen.  "You're getting it done.  And did I ever tell you that you look like Scott Peterson?"

"Did I ever tell you that you have bad taste in futon pillows?" Asked Ted.

3

Little did Ted and Karen know that the procedure wouldn't prevent further spats like this one.  Vasectomy or no, they were destined to a lifetime of bickering.

4

Reluctantly, Ted went in for a consultation.  "Your weenie is right here," the doctor said, while gesturing towards an anatomically-correct drawing.  "Your marbles are right here.  We'll just be snipping the tube that now serves as the marble/weenie connector.  Do you have any questions?"

"Are you sure that you can see the connector properly through those coke-bottle glasses?" Ted asked.

"Don't worry," the doctor said.  "I'm having Lasik done next week."

5

Of all aspects of the surgery, Ted found this one most troublesome.

6

Strangely, the surgery aged both Ted and Karen about 20 years.  Karen traded in her leggings for high-waisted grandma pants, and Ted suddenly sprouted cankles.  Isotoner slippers were worn by all during the recovery period, while Karen served Ted sliced apples along with his tall glass of gin and bottle of Vicodin.

7

And after that, every day of life was just like a walk in the park.  Although Ted did feel the need to wear an overly-long jacket to hide the shriveled remains of his once virile man-parts.

The End.

Story by Martha Kimes, The Random Muse, reprinted by permission of the fabulous author. Pictures by mysterious unsung medical illustrator.

Martha's new book, IVY BRIEFS: A Privileged and Confidential Law School Story, which tells her comic adventures as a Midwestern girl who survives Columbia Law School, is coming out this fall. She saw the above pamphlet photos in a doctor's office recently and couldn't stop howling. Thanks to my secret reader who forwarded me the link!

May 19, 2006

The Abstinence War Room

       

"Abstinence Comes to Albuquerque" is the name of this fascinating documentary about a sex battle royale in New Mexico's urban public schools.  Wait 'til you hear about the covert "purity" war room!

(I have to insert a note here that I was once an absolute FIEND in Albuquerque myself).

The feature is about how the religious right, under the cover of "education," got millions to install one of their wacky abstinence programs into New Mexico high schools, with no one making a peep until one parent  blew a whistle.

When I say wacky, I mean, it's not only unscientific, Biblically-bizarre, and physically unsound— it's also inflammatory paranoia that would make any rational person's head spin.

The film is captivating for all of its 30 minutes. There are rivetting interviews with people like Leslee Unruh, the charismatic spokesperson for "The Abstinence Clearinghouse." You look at her polished blonde face glowing with talk about purity, and then you see the largely working class, Hispanic, and Black high school students/parents talking soberly about their take on it all. It is such a dramatic culture clash.

There was one aspect I was disappointed in, although not surprised. The filmmakers are not confident enough to show high school students saying, "Yes, I have sex and I like it, I know what I'm doing, I'm protected, and it means a lot to me. I'm not coerced, I'm pro-active!"

Those students exist, but there's a media blackout on them. You aren't allowed to be a powerful 16-year-old  who has her own sexual self-confidence. You apparently can't even say, "Hey, I love my boyfriend," or "I'm bi!" or "I'd  like to have a lover!" You can't even say you masturbate, if you're under 18. Everyone is afraid of being busted, for the crime of being a sex-positive teenager, even though we know it's part of the reality, and these young activists are the hope of the future.

They show the feminist students who are into doing peer education, and they are indeed motivated by their political ideals of sisterhood and empowerment for young women.

BUT! Some of those young women are also taking the sex education they've received and using it personally to actually enjoy their own private love lives. It's not about their "virginity"— it's about their self-knowledge. Their ability to discriminate in a positive way, to know what they want and don't want, what they like and don't like, is a huge break with their Catholic submissive lay-down-and-close-your-eyes upbringing.

They're the ones to watch, not the poor babes running around with their chastity rings ready to break in two.

Another thing I love about this movie is that you can get a free VHS or DVD copy of it from the director, Charles Stuart.

Thanks to Feministing for the alert, and to Planned Parenthood for more background on the film.

Bow Down to the Spike



Bedazzled Podcast 1
Video sent by susiebright

Bedazzled, the pleasure chakra brainchild of Spike Priggen, is a blog that features nostalgic movies, TV ads, and music from America's demented popcult childhood.

Spike has a eye for the mink that will make you scream, piss, and moan with unrealized yearnings. I had NO idea that seeing b&w TV clips of Raquel Welch, the Everly Brothers, and Mattel-toys-my mom-would-never-buy-me would bring me to my knees, but it's true.

This particular video podcast is Spike's newest effort. The segment that will sear your mind forever is an Everly Brothers' rock 'n' roll medley on a long-forgotten variety show.  It starts out slow— pure kitsch— and you wonder when they're going to start singing. But then all harmonic hell breaks loose. The genetic musical connection between those two is INSANE. One ache, one voice,  one rhythm, coming out of two heads.

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