I am the biggest sissy at playing Truth or Dare. I always pick Truth, because there isn't much I can think of hiding, especially when it comes to sex.
I'd be more embarrassed if someone asked me how long I sucked my thumb as a child, and that's not what the other Truth'N'Darers are interested in.
"Have you ever done DEEP THROAT?" —Terry Englestrom asked me that once at some teenage sleepover in the 70s, a time when Linda Lovelace had set the bar.
"Yes, Terry." Not only that, but I'd already figured out your clitoris is never going to be in your throat, and circus acts have limited attention spans. No one ever falls in love with you because of sword-swallowing fellatio. Yet the hype was INCREDIBLE.
I would have balked if Terry had dared me do anything. Hand over the reins to her? To make me do god-knows-what? My heels would have dug into the bedrock. I don't know if this is my flaw or my luck, but I have been a dud at sex games ever since.
That's why it took me by surprise when I started talking about sex games on my In Bed show, and it started a listener pandemonium. One of my regular subscribers wrote in and said she played a game with her husband and another couple that took her from "sweet little innocent wife" to "swinging nymphomaniac" in under 60 seconds.
Okay, I'm exaggerating, just a little. But she had an eyeopening time, and I got dozens of emails after the show, begging me for the name of this seminal sex game.
I didn't know! Miss Thing told us everything but the brand name! However, with all the interest, I had to get to the bottom of the orgy pile, and I finally discovered the title: Intense Sex Games, from GreatSexGames.com. They make a whole set of games, on cards, or on DVD, that up the ante depending on how wild and unmonogamous you want to get.
(Actually, they refer to all their games as "designed for monogamous couples," which I gather means that when you go finally go home, you have the right keys!)
I also got some great letters from women explaining why they like to play erotic games... these women are like the Venus and Serena of sexual competition. They have a yen to win, as the ultimate rush, and yet get motivated by the danger of losing as well. They like to play all sort of games, not just sexy ones. I'm sure they would destroy me in everything from tiddlywinks to titty torture.
Here's the obstacle for me: I would feel awful if I won one of these contests, because I would be overwhelmed with the thought that the "losers" must feel awful. I couldn't concentrate on anything else. I got a 10 on my blow job and you only got an 8? I would die of guilt. I'm not worthy. Here, take my trophy.
On the other hand, if I got an 8, or worse yet, a 2, I'd be so humiliated I'd want to disappear in a puff of smoke.
As you can see, I don't have what it takes to be a good sport. No wonder I don't even get invited to ping-pong matches. I like to invent games, though— what does that mean? The GreatSexGames creators sent me some photos of their Casual Friday board meetings, in the buff, and I thought that looked more fun than any round of cards! I want to think of more outrageous stuff, and then make OTHER people do it.
In Bed with Susie Bright 216: Sex Games
On this week's In Bed, I read all candid letters my women listeners wrote me about their favorite sex games. (Weird that no men wrote me about this!) I also talk about the odd sexual memories I have of 9/11 aftermath, which would have been really touching if you had heard this show a couple weeks ago! This show came out a little late, due to technical difficulties, and I'm sorry for that! But considering Hurricane Katrina, it is still apt to talk about the kind of sex we have in disasters. I should do a whole book of apocalyptic erotic salvation!
