A recent and brilliant Op-Ed in the L.A. Times by Linda Williamson gets my head spinning about the new absurdities of child-predator panics.
Yes, students are now being banned from riding their bicycles to school, to protect them from marauding bands of molestors. Fat chance!
In Bed with Susie Bright 290: Let Kids Outdoors
Then, on the second half of my show, I confess my online blogwriter-crush on MonMouth— a London male escort:
...I wrote yesterday that most of my dates are exciting—
Well, blue skies bring tears. Having just posted the entry, I proceeded to last night's date. The best thing about it was my regular minicab driver who showed me baby pictures on his mobile as we drove to Hammersmith. It was all downhill after that.I showed up on time, rang the doorbell as instructed, and was greeted by a po-faced maid. A maid! I was surprised she'd let the staff show the rentboy in, but what the hell.
"You M.?" she asked, sneering. I told her that I was, and she conducted me upstairs to madam's room. Suite, more like it. No sign of madam.
"Sit down," the maid said. At this point I had begun to feel like a plumber called in to unclog a particularly stubborn drain.This turned out to be an accurate premonition.
Madam waltzed in, wearing a pale-pink silk robe, her face fully made up. She was pale and plump, the precise opposite of Thursday night's date, in her 50s probably, and nowhere near as articulate. First thing she says: "Stand up, let me see what I get."
Pro that I am, I stood up, unbuttoned my jacket. "Good," she snaps. "I'm expected somewhere at [time] and I expect to be bored. I need oral, and a good shagging. Can you handle that?"
"Yes," I said, a bit unenthusiastically.
"No touching the face. Just had my makeup done."
The idea of ruining her paint-job by splattering her face with my cum made things just about interesting enough to proceed. She sat down on a couch and opened the robe. Nothing on underneath. I undressed slowly while she stroked herself, then knelt down and worked her pussy over with tongue and fingers hoping that if she'd come often enough like this she wouldn't hold out for the shagging.
No such luck. I only managed a hard-on by concentrating on the memory of Thursday night, and my Asian date's luscious lips sliding over the head of my cock while I stroked her generously proportioned ass, two fingers in her pussy. Madam Pink, by contrast, really made me feel I was at work - even her moans of pleasure (I assume) came out in a tone she could have used to summon the maid.
She came, for the second time, and we were finished at 10 minutes under schedule. She began to dress immediately, in panties and bra while I pulled my clothes on. I didn't even count the roll of bills she handed me, just pocketed it, smiled, nodded politely and left.
I had my regular cabbie pick me up. Waiting for him at a bus stop, I found out she'd paid me almost double what we agreed. Every penny of that felt richly earned. The new dad at the wheel got a sizeable tip too.
Jeff Gannon, take note. Actually, everyone can take a bloody note. You may spend hours reading this fellow's diaries; Monmouth is such a great raconteur. And he talks about all sorts of things— his relationship and negotiations with his wife, his day job at "Saltmine Inc.," his doubts and wonderings about what all this amounts to.
Here's the link to my entire show: Link
Finally, in the Try This at Home mailbag— an In Bed first!— I read a personal ad on the air from one of our listeners, and ask for likely suitors to step forward.
My photo above is especially interesting today: It's a still from "The Bicycle Ride," an animation short by David Normal, which is a fanciful depiction of Dr. Albert Hofmann's discovery of LSD. This cartoon was debuted at the "LSD Symposium" held in honor of Albert Hofmann's 100th birthday in Basel, Switzerland.
Don't forget, you can send your confidential questions, personal-ad pitches, feedback about the show, and requests for Susie's free-show Girly Cards by dropping a line to [email protected] (Episode 290, April 20, 2007)
